If you were to write or you ever write a book, who would you acknowledge or dedicate it to?

When my historical novel (written in Chinese) was published, I dedicated it to my father. He didn’t read it.

If I ever publish my English novel (historical horror), I will dedicate it to my friend Jeff. He’s the ONLY person who believed in me when I first started. He is the ONLY person who read my hot garbage first draft of my very first English novel and gave me honest, constructive feedback. He has always been very supportive of my writing projects and has volunteered to read every first draft of hot garbage I wrote. The guy is an editor (with a master's in creative writing from an Ivy League university), and he has every right to laugh at my meager attempt at telling a coherent story in a language that wasn’t my native tongue, but he didn’t. He chose to be kind and supportive.

Brandon Sanderson once discussed how to give feedback, specifically about “starting with the good.” New writers need that; we need to know what we did well, so we 1) don’t go fix it and 2) continue doing it.

Now that I think back, I realize how much I benefited from Jeff’s feedback because that’s what he did. He started with the good, that I have a unique voice and perspective. So, I never stopped telling my stories, even if they might not be popular or perhaps even relatable for English-speaking readers.

The creative writing community (like many creative communities) can be toxic. You don’t need to look far. Plenty of published writers (some of them famous) regularly give “writing advice” on Quora. Most of them are snarky and offputting with that “LOL, your shit will never get published, what are you thinking?” or “OMG, you don’t even know the basics? How dare you call yourself a writer.” vibe. There’s a reason I avoid those people like the plague.

Snarky, bitter criticism is fun to write for “established” writers and fun to read for non-writers who never attempted to tell a story. However, for those who actually asked the question or those who are struggling, this type of “feedback” is neither helpful nor entertaining.

If I had run into those “esteemed, published writers” instead of Jeff during my early writing attempts, I would probably have given up altogether. But luck would have it, I was having dinner with Jeff at E3 one year, and I told him about the stupid story I wrote. Jeff was the first person I shared my manuscript with. I couldn’t ask for a better friend. If my book is ever published, it wouldn’t have happened without his early support.

I tried to pay it forward. I try to be supportive and encouraging when I answer writing advice questions at Quora. Partly because, well, I’m struggling just like every new writer out there. Partly because I know new writers sometimes just need sincere help instead of snarky “tough love.” We have had enough bullying disguised as “constructive criticism.”

Writing is hard. You’re already published. You don’t need to put down the little guys to make yourself feel better. If you don’t have a kind word to say, try “STFU.”

So, if I had ever published my “Chinese Gothic Horror” story, I would dedicate it to my dear friend Jeff for his kindness and support.