Can you write something that looks like Trump wrote it without any help?

Of course. I’m a terific writer. Everyone is talking about it. I really should have won a Nobel prize for my writing but they gave it to Obama. Because the voting was rigged. A lot of people don’t know that. But people come up to me all the time with tears in their eyes and say, “oh, Mister President! You’re such a great writer. Your tweets are so inspirational. You should have been a writer.” And maybe I should have. I could have been poet Laurie Yet or something. But I went into the hotel business instead. Man woman camera television.