How can we have an understanding of reality or knowledge if there is no causal relationship between events?

Every event has its own rules and reality. For example, a person loses their child and mourn of course. At the same time, other person may lose A+ point and being second in a group and mourn again. This two examples are really so different each other but the people in these two events have same disappointment and same sadness. Their degrees are really so far from each but meantime inter rules and reality they have same pain actually. So if you need to understand some reality or knowledge you have to feel that events as yours. It calls empathy or something else maybe but if you need some correlations you first feel that events as your events.